


I go about things the wrong way baby. Ass backwards.

by Phorn



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF)
Genre: <3, Aftercare, Anal Sex, BDSM, Body Modification, Bondage, Branding, Controlling, M/M, Rough Sex, a bunh of other shit too its kinky my dude, millionaire au, of course some aftercare after all the fun u deserve it
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-10-05
Updated: 2016-10-13
Packaged: 2018-08-19 15:49:38
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,615
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8215366
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Phorn/pseuds/Phorn
Summary: I'm going to bring your world crashing down around you. I'm gonna fuck you up without further ado because-Dan is a needy boyfriend and his husband is away on business, and not answering his calls. So kitten hops in a private jet, becuase it seems both of them need to be reminded who they belong to.Oh my! They're having quite the adenture. Lets turn the page and see what the fuck they do next.





	1. The fuckening  //dun dun dunnn//

**Author's Note:**

> The song that all these random quotes are from is Ass Backwards by Mindless Self Indulgence

Dan Howell stood imposingly, looking out into the beautiful valley of freshly fallen snow. The forest was just a small ways away, and it faded into darkness and eventually mountains. He was in his in-law family's private resort, passed down for generations. The building was warm and smelled of firewood and fir, but the window still let in some of the cold air. He looked out the glass with a vengeance, narrowing his eyes. He glanced down once more at the phone in his hand, but no texts showed up under Phil's name, he wasn't even typing. The read receipt he always left on was right beside his last message. He let out an exasperated sigh and threw the phone at the couch. He began to pace back and forth on the massive bear fur rug. Where was he right now? He surely was being notified that his pet was texting him, and he was most likely the one reading it, right? Dan felt one of the flares of anger he was prone to swell in his chest. He marched over to his discarded phone and quickly pressed his thumb to the home button, the device welcoming him into the home screen. With an angry flourish he found his most used contact, and pressed 'call'.

"Hello, this is the representative of Phil Lester of Lester Corporations. May I ask who is calling?" 

"Who the fuck do you think I am? I'm calling on the phone that I always use. I would like to know why Phil isn't answering me." 

" Mr. Lester is in a meeting. I can take a message and he will respond within-" 

"Phil will respond right now. Ally? Kai? Who the hell even is this." Dan growled, absolutely livid. "Mr. Lester is busy. He will call you back." Just as Dan opened his mouth to hiss a command, the very unfamiliar dial tone interrupted him. 

)()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()( 

Phil sighed, walking into his office lounge with a slowed gait. He was exhausted from the earlier meeting, taking up an insane portion of the day over idle statistics. Nothing seemed to matter, and everyone else had had emails and texts to answer. He was a bit confused, and slightly hurt, that nobody had bothered to contact him. Even his husband was apparently too busy to send a simple hello. He was worried because of how out of the ordinary it was, and pulled his phone out of a shirt pocket. 

Except it wasn't a phone. It was a tiny booklet he had been given that he mistook for his phone. Meaning there was a full seven hour period of unannounced separation from Dan. 

Oh shit. 

Phil dashed out of his office to find his two main assistants, Ally and Kai finishing up for the day. "Hey Phil." Kai greeted, "Whats the hurry?" Phil looked frantically for the familiar metallic shimmer of his phone. "Have either of you seen my personal Iphone?" He fretted, shuffling papers and looking in drawers. Both Ally and Kai exchanged a confused look. "Not since you had it this morning." They responded almost synchronously. "I must have put it down somewhere, I didn't have it all day apparently." He stuttered. Both Ally and Kai widened their eyes. The two settled the papers they had been shuffling about, and hurried to assist Phil. "Did you hear anything from Dan?" Ally questioned worriedly, tearing drawers open to check all of the silly places her boss could have left it. "No." Phil replied, and all three knew what this meant. 

Dan Lester was a bratty spouse to say the least. He clung to Phil like a tight fitting shirt. He was his pet, his other half, and the two were very rarely separated. Phil had no complaints, he adored his snarky lover and was just as happy to devote his free time entirely to the younger. The two were constantly together, walking side by side like a serendipitous pair of siamese cats. Both were astoundingly sharp on their own, but a power-couple of fame and fortune together. Phil a young and beloved heir coming from an aristocratic, wealthy dynasty; along with Dan who was an attractive lower middle-class british schoolboy with an expensive taste and looks to kill, it was a match made in heaven and hell. Phil discovered Dan as a bitchy wannabe who was willing to be a trophy husband to only the wealthiest of men. Dan was completely unaware of Phil's massive inheritance when they met, and reluctantly began to talk with him. After a long four months of the younger falling for whom he assumed to be an office employee and a proposal, Phil revealed his family and the fact his flat was like a shed for the family estate he usually resided in. The younger was almost drooling when he first saw the massive fountain of his new fiancee's Japan abode. He quickly fell into the paradise of having an all-inclusive lover and sugar daddy. 

While Dan usually enjoyed his life of lazing around, constantly treated as royalty and experiencing whatever peaked his interest; Phil continued his mother's lifestyle of working hard for the sake of the results. Both could live comfortably without making another penny ever again, but the co-head of Lester Corporations was addicted to success and domination. They ruled a solid chunk of the economy, and Phil had gone on this meeting to merely show up and listen to facts he already heard, alongside similarly wealthy figures. Dan had been urged by his mother and father in law to go with his politically revered new family to Colorado. There was a good opportunity to re-affirm the bond by spending time with his Grandma (and maybe top up the inheritance). Phil gently pushed him to obey his parent's wishes, and Dan had begrudgingly agreed. Phil vowed 24/7 contact with him while he was in Germany, and Dan had warned of consequences if Phil did not follow through. Panic sunk in as Victorie, a new addition to the Lester team of PA's strutted in with confidence. In her hand was a far too familiar piece of space grey, matted metal. 

"I found your phone, Mr. Lester! I answered your calls all day! Some really rude guy called a ton of times. 'Dan', for a second I thought that was your husband but then I swore his name started with a 'm'." She babbled. The girl was just out of her second year of college, and was a family friend. With her internet-free and strict upbringing in a severe Catholic boarding school, she was unaware of the massively influential couple and some common gossip and information about them. All three froze as they prepared an angry scolding almost instantaneously, but the buffeting of a helicopter's blades began to radiate through the penthouse suite. Victorie gasped in excitement and bounced to the rooftop entrance, while the three others took in the oncoming dread. They all knew who it was, and Phil picked up his phone off the small table. 

❤ 


	2. All aboard the kinky train (choo choo)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Dan is on fire amirite

Dan-Ten missed calls.

42 new messages 

9 am: 

Dan :Morning love! I know its 9 thr but i wanted to say hi before i went 2 brd. Dan: u must be busy, night <3\. 

12:16 pm: 

Dan:I can't sleeeeewpppl withot u bside me :// 

Dan: This bed just isnt warm enough w/out u ;) 

Dan: Idgaf if ur busy answer me. 

12:37pm: 

Dan: Answer me now shitfce ik ur reading thia. 

Dan: srsly. 

Dan:wow k fuck u then. 

Dan:I guess ill just jerk it by myself. 

1:45pm: 

Dan: Answer me now I can see you reading this. 

Dozens of messages saying the same follow. 

4:13pm: 

Dan: You think u can get ur PA to hang up on me? 

Dan: Lets see if you can fuck me hard enough to stay with you tonight shitstain. Yu better tie me down so i dont get up. 

Dan: I'm literally on my way to germany rn in a fucking jet. 

Dan: Ill give u one chance to tespond now, and i'll play this off as an excuse to see my mum in england. Or can stop in paris and we can let you off easy. 

Dan: if ur gonna try to br8k up w/ me i still take millions from u. 

Dan: but i know thats not the case, u couldnt find an ass this nice to satisfy your cock. 

Dan: well there goes ur chance at saving u from tonight. U better have some toys, and be in the mood for a scene. 

Dan: good luck explainin why u cant walk in yhe next couple days. 

10 min ago: 

Dan: Berlin is gorgeous at sunset, this view is amazing. I love helicopters. 

2 min ago 

Dan: Prepare for the fucking storm, love. 

)()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()( "It was lovely Mrs. Lester! Sorry for leaving a bit early, I thought I had a day to spare. I love you too, tell Hal I say hi, I'll come to London or Colorado soon! Bye." Dan cheerfully spoke, glancing out the window to see the familiar skyscraper. He grinned wider, eyebrows furrowing and warping his features into a malicious smile. The helicopter began the decent, and he spoke up to the pilot. "Just drop me off then head on your way." He pulled out a neatly folded fifty pound note. As the aircraft settled he handed the tip to the man and hopped out the automatically opened door, orange sunlight bathing him in early spring warmth. He strode towards a smaller blonde girl and narrowed his eyes. "Were you the insufferable brat answering my husband's phone, and keeping me from talking?" He snarled, stomping in front of the quickly terrified girl. He pointed at her accusingly, remaining just far away enough to not physically intimidate her. She trembled under his gaze and he quickly turned, muttering "First strike." quietly. The shaken girl scurried over to Kai and Ally, after the two gave Dan a genuine hug and greeting. Kai rolled their eyes at Dan's accusation. "Don't fret darling, I'm on strike eleven." They reassured Victorie. 

Dan stomped up to a horrified looking Phil, gripping his shoulders and thrusting his face into the others, grinning with a predatory look in his eyes. "We are going to your room." He said in a choppy tone, gritting his teeth. Phil felt Dan's fingers claw into the exposed flesh of his forearm, and dragged him into the building. There was a room and furnishings inside, and Ally sighed, smoothing her short straightened hair down. "Poor Mr. Lester. We better get out of here and lock up the office portion, before we hear something we shouldn't". 

)()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()()( 

How the hell it had happened, Dan was unsure. But it almost always seemed to end up like this. Phil was poised behind him, riding crop in hand. Dan was bound up, wrists together and hooked to the headboard while he was on his elbows and knees. A spreader bar forced his legss apart. It wasn't the most hardcore bondage he had been in, but god it still felt amazing. The younger shivered in anticipation, tugging at his binds. A rough hit across his ass made him roll his shoulders and cry out, whimpering and squirming even more. "Master-" he moaned, spreading his legs even further to show his rim, already dripping with lube. The spreader bar accommodated this with some clicks, but when he tried to move his legs back a tad the metal didn't allow it. Phil gently ran a finger along the wet hole, watching it clench further at the sensation. He usually only came this close after it was puffy and swollen, when he was moving to lick at the area to soothe his submissive. Now he had the younger moaning like a bitch underneath him. Phil dropped the crop and grabbed his pets hips, moving to settle between his legs. He rubbed his cock against the crevice of his ass and sighed in boredom, running a hand across red welts from the whipping. 

"You know, I could fuck you hard right now. I could tear apart your cute little ass until you bled and squirmed and begged. You could scream and fight and kick until you were exhausted and I wouldn't stop. I can do whatever I want with you actually. You're my property. Fuck you're gorgeous. You know what? I think I'm going to make a few adjustments to whats mine tonight." While he said it he threaded his fingers gently through Dan's hair, petting him thoughtfully. Dan gasped and tried to speak, choking out the beginning of 'Phil' before a hand shut his mouth forcefully. "That wasn't an invitation to make noise, kitten." He scolded, grabbing the gag he had gotten out with the rest of the gear. Fitting the ball in Dan's mouth, he fastened the strap around his skull. He grabbed one of the clean cloths he kept nearby, running it along the dripping lube and letting it slip just a bit inside the panting submissive beneath him. "You won't be getting fucked well for a while, don't worry about that." He cooed. The other moaned and tried to push himself back onto the pressure. Phil just dried it and stood, smiling down at the younger with a threatening happiness. Dragging a finger up the submissive's thin back and ruffling his hair before he left to go get part of the nights torture. 

The two had talked about branding before, in agonizingly detailed conversations that usually ended with both of them trying to hide any subconscious squirming. Now, Phil gently took the custom iron out of black packaging. He held the cold metal in his hand and grinned. Walking back out to the tied down brunette, he brandished it with a lighter. The area to be pressed into skin was only about the size of a fifty pence coin, but Dan's eyes widened and he began to cry out under the gag, trying his hardest to struggle. Phil rubbed the iron thoughtfully, before taking notice of the particularly fleshy part of his hipbone. He ran his hand down Dan's arm to take ahold of his hand and see if two harsh squeezes came, but the younger felt no need for safe-words. 

He clicked the lighter and it sparked a flame.

**Author's Note:**

> ;p
> 
> Please comment as it means a ton! As this is a hardcore smutfest anthign goes, plz be reasonable with critisisim. Kudos, bookmarks and especially comments mean another chapter :)


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